Saturday, October 15, 2011

I think I can, I think I can...

Remember that childhood story about the little engine that could? I can relate...

A week before every trip we have to take, I start to dread the preparation, the airport negotiation, the constant anticipation...and not in a fun way.  Every month we travel to WI for work and every time Xavi has risen to the occasion, but I still spend plenty of time being anxious and dreading the whole trip. The week before I start with the lists - appointments to make, shopping/errands to do, cleaning I'd like to get done, plus packing clothes, food for Xavi, toys, books, supplements, and getting the carry on/diaper bag just right.  The real butterflies start two days before and by the day before I'm hoping to have it all done so that I can relax the night before...and drink my coffee sitting down before the car comes to pick us up. 

Well, THAT never happens but somehow, we make it into the car for the 30 minute ride to the airport, get undressed for security, recombobulate, buy water, board the plane early, get stuff organized in the seat just so, head to the back of the plane to wait while it loads, take our seat at the last minute, and play/sleep (hopefully) for 2 hours.  Upon touchdown, we're off to find our next flight/gate, play/eat until it's time to board again, and do it all over again.  Once we get to MKE, we collect our stuff from the baggage claim, let's count em:  one diaper bag, one stroller, one car seat, one suitcase, one briefcase on wheels, one baby and one momma. I usually pile it all on top of a rolling cart and carry Xavi in my Moby against my chest.  This draws plenty of looks, especially as I navigate two elevators to get to the car rental section...and there are lots of nice people that hold doors, pick up items I drop, and help balance the load on the cart.  Then we load the car, install the car seat, get Xavi in his seat for one last leg...the last time he screamed the 45 minutes to gramma and grampa's house.  And how could I blame him?  If I wasn't (ahem) 37 and if people weren't looking (haha), I'd do the same thing. 

"ummm, yep mom, I fit!"

doggie to rest my head on? Check. mom's neck pillow? Check.
The return trip is much of the same but in reverse...each trip starts with "I don't think I can do this" and  trepidation for the constant planning/anticipating of each next steps.  With each "victory", that voice changes to "I think I can, I think I can...".  Each time the plane goes into descent, again, "I think I can, I think I can.." Each time we make it to the next leg, "I think I can, i think I can...".  Each time he falls asleep and I can let my guard down just a little bit and read my Kindle...". I think I can, I think I can..". Each time, Xavi looks at me and smiles during all of this or plays his little heart out in the middle of an airport baggage claim, "I think I can, I think I can...".  Each time, Mario sends me a message to stay strong, relax, and be safe..."I think I can, I think I can..".  Once we pull off of 59, onto Highway ZZ, with just a few miles to go...I finally start to think "I know I can, I know I can...".  Once we see hit San Juan Capistrano and then our exit, Camino de Estrella, "I know I can, I know I can...".  Hooray!

We are preparing for another adventure next to New Mexico for my hall of fame induction, then off to New York for our Master's in Nutrition final exam, then off to Wisconsin for a week of work, and then HOME.  So, my little voice "I don't think I can do this..." has officially started ( I know, negative...but am open to any support and hugs :)).  Comfort comes this time knowing that Mario will be with us for this first week, that Debbie will be there in NY to love Xavi while we are sweating the exam, and that mom and dad are waiting to love us in Wisconsin. 

Relaxing fall walks with gramma, grampa, and Taz

Playing with Taz's bone

Dragging around Grampa's shoe...quite a load!  14s!
Here's some memories from our last trip...and here's to many more adventures AND memories!
Surprise!  Sister and Cousin reunion...In town for the Packer game and to love us while we are close.
Thanks everyone for another good memory.

Gramma Mimi came too...Xavi wouldn't go to her this time, but he wouldn't go to anyone else that week.

The best kind of mornings...undressed and no place to go.

VitaKids playtime

Tubby time

Tazzie loved the attention and his new buddy

Walking with Gramma while mom had to go do work stuff

Lovely Miss Armandina at VitaKids

Last leg heading home..."I know we can" whenever there are smiles like this

Go Pack! Great garage sale find...Thanks Gramma momma!
Thanks to everyone who supports us every day and on every trip.  Thanks for those on both ends praying for our safety and "victorious" arrival.  Thanks to the nice seat mates that offer encouragement and kindly play with Xavi.  Thanks to the people that stop and ask if they can help OR those that just do (Put my briefcase in the overhead bin (tricky with a baby on board), open my stroller, wait patiently while we get organized, etc, etc).  Thanks to those that stare incredulously as I walk by with the rolling luggage makes me feel proud, well, as long as the bags stay balanced long enough to look like I  am in control of this operation.  Thanks to Xavi for being such a good, happy be content to be with momma regardless of the location/circumstances...and for reminding me that I CAN do this and anything else that we set our minds to. 

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