"Spring" Break Midwest Style (aka SNOW break)

Here are the highlights of our March trip to the frozen tundra.  Warning:  Mostly a Lot of photos from our trip with family...

First flight with two babies by myself?  I give myself an A for effort, C for execution (TOO MUCH SHTUFF), and an A for overall outstanding behavior (the kids were pretty good too).  Although I did notice that my jaw hurt pretty bad from clenching so hard and I am pretty sure I went hours without a full breath...sigh.  Maybe someday I'll be able to carry on again when traveling (and take a nap or have a drink in a cup without a lid or watch the movie or read my book).  

IPad snacks and trains = lifesavers

This one squirmed the entire trip and did a bit of screaming because I wouldn't let him crawl under seats

I actually sat on the floor in front of the seats to let him sit by himself for awhile...it's a wonder I didn't get stuck!  

New friends at MSP

Xavi loves to watch the airplanes come and go

Hmmm...what does mom have in here?

"OK Nico...when it's our turn you have to get your snack bag and go down the aisle...OK?"

         

Getting Outside? The first few days were the worst...once he got the hang of it all, he was a bit less miserable. But I mean for a kid that hates to wear a diaper let alone clothes plus jacket, snow pants, socks, boots, mitten, hat...he was none too pleased.  Nico...well he did a bit better but he did have a comfy place to ride.

Xavi found a puddle to play in after all

And he got good at walking through deep snow to see...

THE HORSIES!  

Carrots and apples...every day, twice a day.  

Sick and/or snowy...the ponies whinnied when they saw us coming.

A winter wonderland...and some little stroller tracks from the mama engine that could

Not feeling great but snug in blanket and stroller for quick horsie check.
I think this was actually the first day of spring...ugh.

  Cousin time!  Rachie, Gramma, Owen, Gabby, and Liam came to see us.  Xavi loved playing with his cousins and practicing wrestling moves.  There was something special about watching Xavi play with his cousins, his family...different than with friends or kids at the park.  I had this gut reaction that my kids HAD to know their cousins, their family...I want us to live closer to family.  Guess I am glad we aren't going to Guam or Hawaii after all...We'll still have to travel but it's well worth the TMJ problems.

Big cousin Owen was such a great sport

So was Gabby!

Liam and Nico, born just 7 weeks apart...were "fast friends" and both fascinated with their images on the IPad...notice the paparazzo in the background.

Both trying to get Nico and Liam playing with the IPad

getting acquainted during tummy time...Nico keep trying to taste Liam.  Hmmm...maybe that's how we all got sick?

3 Monkeys in a row...just missing Gramma Momma

Playing and Sharing! his precious trains...Xavi shows Owen some of his collection

Sick time! We all got sick for the last week of our stay there...it reminded me of all the other times we came to WI in the winter...fevers, coughs, hours in the rocker...but this time there were two!  Poor babies!

Grampa Time!  Mom still had to be at work every day but Dad was home quite a bit.  Nico and Grampa were quite the buddies...he woke up extra early to go hang out with Grampa in the kitchen in his special Bumbo chair.  Grampa just kept handing him his toys while keeping knives etc out of reach...Mama got to get a few extra minutes of sleep.  Thank the LORD!! When has that ever happened before?  HA!  Xavi even got to go sledding with Grampa...but it wasn't at killer hill this time.

Stealing kisses...I mean, who hasn't done this?

Playing trains over Grampa's Hands

We'll definitely have to come back...when it warms up and we can swim, go to the zoo, have bonfires, and play outside.  See you then Gramma and Grampa!

Mama Strong

 There are a lot of organizations, communities, and people claiming the title of "strong"...Live Strong, Army Strong, etc...but I'm proud to belong to the "MamaStrong" club.  Nothing has made me grow more, open more, live more, see more, kick my butt more, humble more, or love more than becoming a mama.  These two gifts that made me a mama are all that I needed to celebrate this Mother's Day.  Granted I was jolted awake by 612am, then puked on, stinky pooped on, and had a train track thrown at my head by 730 (promptly followed by a time out complete with wild animal noises serenading me from Xavi's room).  Oh and did I mention the dog has fleas?  Like I said.  MamaStrong.

 Today though I also think of my mama, my beautiful, tough, strong, fighting, never give up mama, who taught me to never give up, to always give it all, and to laugh like a lady (Tee hee).  Thank you mom.  I love you and miss you every day...every day.

I think of my amazing Gramma Mimi...who was strong enough to be gramma and grampa times two for me and my sisters.  Strong, body, soul, and mind, she epitomizes what I hope to be like when I'm a senior citizen.  Gardening, going to the Y for "silver streakers" (i mean sneakers), road tripping, camping, and loving her grand kids and her great grandkids...I love you Gramma to the moon and back.  Wish I could drop in for some cookies, yummy soup, and a hug.  Nico sure loved you in March and Xavi can pick "mimi" out of any line up.

Gramma Mimi and her great grand kids...Xavi Xavi...always one right?

Two of your grandkids:  Both of us were your roommates for a time before becoming mamas...fond memories

 I think of my beautiful, incomparable sisters.  Strong, committed, loving, funny, and the best friends I could ever hope for.  Rachel balances working as a teacher, just a few hobbies, an active church life, OH and three kids.  She is an example of a quiet strength that runs very deep. She gets my stupid jokes and makes me laugh.  If only I could put Minnesota next to an ocean...and lose the 8 month winter...we could be neighbors AND coffee buddies!  I love you!

 Lori...what can I say?  We've been close forever...fighting like the dickens then laughing til we pee.  There is no one like you and you will be an amazing mama. I can't wait to go on this journey with you. You have the strength already, you're already rocking the maternity power suit and heels...MamaStrong welcomes you.  I love you.

 My big sister, Julie.  Strong as in jumping down mountains, on boards and bikes, without pause or fear.  Strong as in taking on motherhood like no one has before...I mean Elodie already skis AND bikes better than I can. Julie's another from the never give up, never give in club...and when she is on your team, breath deep and relax...she's got your back.  Love you Jewels!

My friend and substitute Mama, Debbie.  Our angel whom God sent just when we needed both a friend and family to help.  Beautiful inside and out...Strong and kind, loving and firm...she has the strength that gives, that is flexible, that loves me and my boys like only family can.  We love you and adore you. 

Mama Mary (Gramma Nina) who gave birth to my husband and my children's father.  Thank you for loving him and for being the kind, patient, and loving gramma that you are. We love you and miss you and hope it isn't long until we see you again.  Happy Mother's day!

Mama Doctor Jen who encouraged us to have the birth experience we both wanted and who has since then, been a rock and backbone (pun intended) that I rely on for my family's healthcare..and my sanity.  

Mama midwife Karen who guided us during both births.  She gave us the gift of gentle strength and wisdom that made our memories, and births amazing.  It wouldn't have been the same without her and I am eternally grateful to her for being there.

Mama doula/helper Susan who came almost whenever I needed her in the early days after Nico's birth and when Mario was gone.  I didn't realize how much I'd come to depend on her being there until she had to get a "real" job. She'd back me up when I doubted myself and she held me up when I thought I just couldn't do it.

And my beautiful friend, Jackie...strong mama of four who's been through more than her share of storms and dark days.  She's shown me what beauty looks like...what true strength is made of...and continues to be a living example of grace, love, and authenticity.  

"I didn't lose my mind...I put it some place safe!"  

 Today I celebrate my boys and the mamas that have made my life different because of who they are.  There are many more and maybe even a few that I forgot to mention here...but

 Mama strong doesn't mean you have all the answers...

 Or even get it right half the time (even if you aren't sleep deprived).

 MamaStrong is being in the arena and never giving up, never giving in...

 MamaStrong is giving all you have in every moment, every day...

Only to wake up and do it all over again the next.

And most of the times, we do it without cards, flowers, or fanfare.  So on the special day like today a little appreciation goes a long way...but for me, I'm happy to have the blessings of two boys who love their mama, a husband who supports me even when I'm crazy, and a stinky little dog named Diego...who i practiced on for many years.  Happy Mama's day to all the mamas!  MamaStrong.

Home Stretch

When I raced, I never worried about the finish.  I knew if I could just get to the last 500 meters in good position that not very many people could out kick me.  I dreaded the race for at least a week prior and before I raced in Athens, I remember sitting on the grass feeling like I could puke and saying "I just don't want to do this" as my number was getting pinned on.  But there was always the adrenalin to get me through the first third...then came the middle third or so.  Ugh.  That's when things got tough..and ugly.  That's when the gremlins started to really amp up the negativity..."omg, this hurts so bad" and "is it worth it to KILL yourself like this?" and "really?  no one's watching...slow up a bit" or my favorite "does it really matter if it's fourth or sixth place?".  I could usually keep them in check enough to stay in position, fighting myself to get where I wanted, and be in the right place to finish strong.  I actually loved digging in deep and being able to find that last gear, pulling away and then the finish line...sweet finish line.  To be able to stop, lie down, walk, and smile...knowing that it was all over (at least for now).

Well, here we are.  Less than two weeks until Mario gets home after 13 months of being gone.  Yes, we saw him occasionally and lastly, at Christmas...but that middle section sure kicked my butt this time.  Right now, I've dug in and found that last gear to bring us all home to the finish.  It's not easy as there have been a few obstacles to get over...including news that we were moving to Guam?! No wait...Hawaii! We are moving to Hawaii!  No wait...Mario got selected for the job he wanted initially...here we come San Diego!  Really? Well, we have a lease there and some "new" furniture for the house I found.  but I guess if it's one thing I've learned...it's that flexibility is important as a military spouse.  Things are not only probably going to change, they are almost guaranteed to NOT go as expected.  Good training for me as I am not the world's most flexible person (figuratively not literally...of course I can touch way past my toes).

I am going to try in these last two weeks to catch up on the last two and a half months that I've been AWOL from posting.  (Now that no one is following anymore...I guess it doesn't really matter since I am not doing this for any other reason but to connect with my family and dear friends...and to document these days for posterity.  Someone posted a comment here with the message that "I (this anonymous person) used to get good advice/information here"...as if I was disappointing someone.  Well?  I am disappointed in myself and wish I haven't been so neglectful.)  I wish I could keep my eyes open to have kept up with this...but in order to get through that tough middle part of this race we've been running? I needed to go to bed by 9.  I needed to be a zombie in front of the stupid TV box for 15 minutes in order to numb my brain and stop the buzzing.  I needed to write my husband or talk to him via Skype.  I needed to quiet the gremlins so that I could be here in this position at the end...ready to kick it in.I am so proud of us and I'm so thankful that I was here for every last moment, even when it felt like someone was torturing me with sleep deprivation.  Water board me any day...just don't wake me up hourly for weeks at a time.  Mario will have a lot of catching up to do when he gets home but we will all be together again...in a new house, in a new city, in a new chapter.  And for now anyway, the sleeping has found a better, more sane rhythm.

The boys are so different today than they were before our March "winter adventure".   Xavi is now singing the Thomas songs, naming all the trains (even obscure ones that I only know because I can read), asking for "presents" when the UPS guy comes, talking in complete sentences, talking about going on the potty (not always going), riding ponies, asking for bandaids and "mednicine" to fix "poochies" (pokeys and ouchies put together), asking me "is you ok?", begging for "no time out, no time out" after hitting or pushing his brother, and saying "i sorry that happened" when he hurts himself.

Nico has two teeth, curly hair, and a determined spirit.  Nothing stops him from his hearts desire and he wants to play with anything that is Xavi's or that Xavi is playing with.  i thought I had another six months or so until i was breaking up "fights'...not so.  He crawls like a maniac, pulls up on everything, swims like a fish, and smiles to light up the room.  He puts everything in his mouth and gets mad when I take the plastic bag, paper envelope, magazine, or rocks away.  He doesn't care that he isn't a goat.  He wants what he wants and don't get in his way.  (Oh dear...how did we get TWO of those??)

Their spirits are so different but their hugs, kisses, smiles, and dimples have kept me going.  We are going to make it to the end...and I'm pretty sure that when we do, the feeling of completing this "race" will surpass any race I've ever run.  Can I get an Amen?